If you’ve read my blog before, you probably know that I consider myself a language nerd. I love the beauty and craft of the written word. Many don’t like the idea of studying language because, let’s be honest, learning grammar can be such a drag. I too did not particularly enjoy learning about grammar in elementary and high school. It was only in university that I actually started enjoying it. That’s because elementary and high school teachers tend to talk about grammar and language as a long list of strict, finicky, and irritating little rules that anyone can use as an excuse to wag their finger at you and proclaim that you’re doing something wrong.

Language is far too complex and flexible to easily fit onto a simple set of rules. Many of the rules we were taught were not only irritating but also misguided. In this post, I will endeavour to liberate you from some common grammar myths that may still haunt you. I’ll also share some language secrets that expose how fascinating language truly is.

Grammar Myth #1: Thou shalt never split an infinitive.

An infinitive is a verb (action word) in its simplest form. In English, all infinitives need to have the word “to” in front of them. For example, “to have,” “to write,” and “to sing” are all infinitive verbs. Sometimes, people like to put descriptive words inbetween the “to” and the verb. For example, “to boldly go where no one has gone before.” Those who believe in this rule would claim that this quote is grammatically incorrect. It should be either “boldly to go where no one has gone before” or “to go boldly where no one has gone before.” To everyone’s relief, this rule is entirely poppycock.

Do you want to know where this rule came from? Scholars hundreds of years ago thought that Latin was the best language ever. They thought that Latin was so dope that they tried to take Latin syntax rules and force them onto English. Thankfully, such illogical and unfounded manipulation of a living language is no longer recommended practice among modern linguists.

Grammar Myth #2: Thou shalt never use “thankfully” or “hopefully” as sentence-level adverbs.

Adverbs are a type of descriptive word that usually ends in -ly, such as quietly, quickly, and quixotically. A sentence-level adverb is a type of descriptive word that applies to the entire sentence rather than only one part of a sentence. These adverbs usually go at the very beginning of a sentence. Here’s an example of a sentence-level adverb: Frankly, I don’t think that’s a useful rule.

Some people really don’t like it when you use the words thankfully or hopefully as sentence-level adverbs. Their argument is that because you cannot say “it is thankful that we got here in time,” you shouldn’t say “thankfully, we got here in time.” There aren’t very strong grammatical grounds for this argument, especially since no one makes nearly the same fuss over similar sentence-level adverbs such as frankly or briefly. In short, you can use thankfully and hopefully as sentence-level adverbs whenever you like. Don’t overcomplicate things for yourself.

Grammar Myth #3: Thou shalt never start a sentence with “because.”

It is entirely acceptable to start a sentence with the word because. You just have to make sure that your statement is a complete idea.

Because is a subordinating conjunction, which basically means that it connects one idea to a related larger idea. Here’s an example: “Christmas is happening over Zoom this year [larger idea] because the pandemic has not ended yet [subordinate idea].”

We typically put the larger idea before the subordinate idea, so the connecting word because usually goes in the middle of the sentence. But it doesn’t have to. You can also reverse the sentence’s order: “Because the pandemic has not ended yet, Christmas is happening over Zoom.” This construction is entirely grammatically correct. What isn’t correct (in formal writing at least) is using a subordinating conjunction without the larger idea. Here’s the sentence you shouldn’t write in a formal context: “Because the pandemic hasn’t ended yet.” In spoken speech, such a statement may be clear with context. (Speaker 1: Why are we meeting over Zoom? Speaker 2: Because the pandemic hasn’t ended yet.) But without that context, the idea just isn’t complete. In formal writing, you shouldn’t rely on that context for clarity.

In short, the actual rule is that you should write complete ideas. Sometimes this stuff just doesn’t have to be that complicated.

Grammar Myth #4: Thou shalt never start a sentence with “but.”

You’ve probably noticed that I start sentences with but in my blog all the time. I am comfortable doing this because most grammarians now agree that there is nothing wrong with it. It contributes to a casual tone, so you may not want to do it in formal writing. But in my case, I do want my blog to have a conversational and approachable tone, so it is entirely appropriate. Context is everything, my friends.

Now, but is a conjunction just like because, so you may be curious why because has more rules around it than but. The reason is that they’re two different types of conjunctions. Because is a subordinate conjunction whereas but is a coordinating conjunction.

Coordinating conjunctions connect two separate ideas together. Coordinating conjunctions place equal weight on both ideas, so it’s easier to hold the two ideas separately. There are only seven coordinating in the English language. If for some reason you need to memorize them, just remember the acronym FANBOYS: for, and, nor, but, or, yet, so.

You can confidently put any of those seven words at the beginning of a sentence. Just avoid doing so in formal contexts, as it makes your writing sound more casual.

Grammar Myth #5: Thou shalt always say “you and I,” never “you and me.”

This rule is so wrong on so many levels. What’s worse is that this rule has been taught so adamantly that the phrase “you and me” still sounds wrong even after learning the correct rule. Every time I check for an errant “you and I,” I cannot judge correctness by ear – I have to judge it by my training.

Here’s how the actual rule works. Pronouns are the words that act as placeholders for names: she, he, they, us, you, etc. There are two main types of pronouns: ones that go at the beginning and represent the sentence’s actor, and ones that go toward the end and represent an acted-upon object. For example, we say that she walked him home but that he walked her home. In short, you use different pronouns in different parts of a sentence. The pronouns we use at the beginning of a sentence are called subjective pronouns because they represent the sentence’s subject. The pronouns we use toward the end of the sentence are called objective pronouns because they represent the acted-upon object of the sentence.

I is a subjective pronoun that goes at the beginning of the sentence (I walked him home). Me is an objective pronoun that goes toward the end of the sentence (he walked me home). In English, the pronoun you can serve as both a subjective and objective pronoun (he walked you home and you walked him home).

With all these terms in place, we can finally get to the actual rule. Use subjective pronouns for the sentence’s subject (or actor) and objective pronouns for the sentence’s object. In simple statements, I goes at the beginning and me goes at the end. So here’s how you “you and I” and “you and me” correctly:

• You and I walked him home.
• He walked you and me home.

If you’re ever unsure, just replace the “you and I” with I or me by itself and see what sounds right. If me sounds right, then go ahead and use “you and me.”

From here on out, don’t be afraid to use “you and me” as an objective pronoun. If anyone tries to correct you, you can simply say, “you and I may disagree, but your rules are too simplistic for you and me.” Okay, that sounds super contrived, but you get the idea.

Now that we’re done with the grammar myths, let’s get on to the really interesting part: the secrets (cue creepy music).

Grammar Secret #1: If you can read this, then you already know all the rules.

Yes, all the rules are there, waiting inside your mind. The examples were likely all you needed to understand what objective and subjective pronouns are. My definitions may have sounded confusing, but once you saw the examples, there’s a good chance you immediately understood what I was getting at. That’s because you already know the rules. You just don’t have language to describe them yet. (Unless, of course, you’ve already studied the metalanguage. In which case, hello fellow language nerd!)

Once you’re fluent in a language, you know all the language’s rules. You just don’t know how to consciously talk about those rules until you learn the language to describe language – that is, the metalanguage.

This was one of the first lessons that my linguistics professor taught me in university, and it kind of blew my mind. It’s so beautiful and bizarre that our unconscious mind can store knowledge that is separate from our conscious mind. Learning language is then the mechanism we use to consciously analyse and understand the world. Language is knowledge. And then when you learn the language to describe language it all becomes so meta and delightfully convoluted.

Anyway, onward to the next language rabbit hole!

Grammar Secret #2: Passive voice is a mysterious tool that others may use against you to hide, avoid, and deceive.

Language is a tool. It’s the path to knowledge, but it’s also the path to deception. While passive voice has many benign and even constructive uses, it also has a dark side and can be used to deflect and deflate.

Let’s start with a quick overview how passive voice works. Passive voice reverses typical sentence structure:

• Active voice: Tony walked the dog.
• Passive voice: The dog was walked [by Tony].

Passive voice makes the person doing the action (in this case, Tony) optional information. The sentence is still complete without naming who walked the dog. That trick allows you to hide information and make it sound like you’re saying something that you actually aren’t.

Take this example: “Mistakes were made.” That may sound like an admission, an apology even. But who made the mistake? Is that person or group actually being held to account in this statement?

Here’s another example: “Some important files may have been deleted.” Again, who deleted the files? What is the specific story behind this statement?

Most uses of passive voice are benign, maybe a bit clunky but certainly not manipulative. Every so often, though, someone uses passive voice to obscure facts and circumvent accountability. Once you can recognize passive voice, you’ll be better equipped to consume messages critically and ask the right questions.

But let’s end the post on a more lighthearted note.

Grammar Secret #3: Youths have always added new rules to language, and adults have always complained about it.

Seriously. This phenomenon is not new. When I say always, I mean ever since we found a way to record and reliably store documents. This phenomenon probably existed before that point too, we just don’t have any records of it for obvious reasons.

Here’s a translated quote from Cicero, a native Latin speaker from 63 CE:

Spoken Latin has picked up a passel of words considered too casual for written Latin, and the grammar people use when speaking has broken down. The masses barely use anything but the nominative and the accusative . . . it’s gotten to the point that the student of Latin is writing in what is to them an artificial language, and it is an effort for him to recite in it decently.

The version of Latin that Cicero was criticizing eventually became what we know today as French.

Here’s another quote from Yoshida Kenkō in his Essays on Idleness (Tsurezuregusa) from 1330-1332 CE:

In all things I yearn for the past. Modern fashions seem to keep on growing more and more debased . . . And as for writing letters, surviving scraps from the past reveal how superb the phrasing used to be. The ordinary spoken language has also steadily coarsened. People used to say “raise the carriage shafts” or “trim the lamp wick,” but people today say “raise it” or “trim it.” When they should say, “Let the men of the palace staff stand forth!” they say, “Torches! Let’s have some light!” Instead of calling the place where the lectures on the Sutra of the Golden Light are delivered before the emperor “the Hall of the Imperial Lecture,” they shorten it to “the Lecture Hall,” a deplorable corruption, an old gentleman complained.

And another from 1841:

For a long time I have noted with regret the almost entire neglect of the art of original composition in our common schools . . . hundreds graduate from our common schools with no well-defined ideas of the construction of our language.

And one from 1936:

The Chairman alluding to the problem of young people and their English said his experience was that many did not seem able to express or convey to other people what they meant. They could not put their meaning into words and found the same difficulty when it came to writing.

And finally, here’s one from today:

From every college in the country goes up the cry, “our freshmen can’t spell, can’t punctuate.” Every high school is in despair because its pupils are so ignorant of the merest rudiments.

Just kidding! That one was from 1917.

Language is living. It evolves and changes over time, adapting to better fit the ever-changing world we live in. Youths tend to be the ones who introduce many of those changes. Language has survived all these bumps and turns so far. Let’s all relax, appreciate the fascinating ways that language organically grows, and not become part of history’s running joke.

(Also, unless otherwise linked, I got all the above quotes from an excellent TED Talk by linguist John McWhorter. To watch the full video yourself, just click here.)

I hope you enjoyed learning about these grammar myths and secrets. If you have any other grammar myths that you’d like to bust, be sure to share them below!